A little more
of my story.

I grew up in Ladbroke Grove, raised by my mum. An only child, a little spoilt, a little sensitive, and always a bit different.

While Mum was at work, my grandmother looked after me. She kept me stocked with videos and toys, though not always strictly by the book, and one memorable trip to Oxford Street ended with an afternoon at a police station and me in tears until Mum came to collect us. Her favourite films were Schwarzenegger and Van Damme, so they became mine too. Looking back, that might have been my first martial arts education. She wasn’t perfect, but she adored me, and I loved her for it. I still do.

I went to St Francis of Assisi, where I somehow got away without learning very much. I loved it anyway, and those are still my best school memories. Sport wasn’t really encouraged, so I made do with chaos in the playground and throwing myself into every school play. Cast as a piper in The Twelve Days of Christmas, I played it like a saxophone solo. Talent debatable. Commitment total.

I was falling behind and not very motivated, so Mum made a big call. She had never asked my father for anything, and now she called in a favour. He paid for private school, and I was off to St Philip’s.

I arrived with a bang. On day one I collected every demerit going for talking and messing around, without even knowing what a demerit was. The headmaster laughed, let me off, and told me that next time I’d be in trouble.

I missed my old friends, but I liked it there. I learnt more than anyone expected and kept up the acting, this time as Little John in Robin Hood. Sport finally found me too. I loved rugby, and basketball took over my life. Every morning I was down at Westway Sports Centre practising my shot. I got pretty good, until genetics had their say. I didn’t grow, and the day a lanky 6' 4" friend started blocking everything, I knew it wasn’t my sport.

Swimming gave me one of my defining memories. My main rival only entered the races he thought he could win, and beat me overall by two points. I sat on the side of the pool crying, knowing nobody could tell because I was still wet. Second place, heart broken. It was probably my first real lesson in losing.

St Philip’s was fun, but it was hard too. Too foreign for some, too middle class for others. I sounded funny, I was different, and I got teased a lot. Today being a bit of an outsider is an advantage. Back then, it just hurt.

Mum had a strong Turkish identity that I didn’t quite share, but I had a loving aunt and cousins, and every summer we all gathered at our little family beach house in Turkey. Everyone under one roof, arguing about everything. At weekends Mum took me along to the beach disco with her friends, and while they danced the night away, I fell asleep on the seats. Being the youngest had its perks.

Business got hold of me early. With my first computer, a Sinclair ZX that loaded games from tape, I started copying games and selling them at school. The recordings weren’t always perfect, and customers complained. My policy was simple: no refunds.

Another time I found a box of sample washing detergent and sold every last one to friends and teachers. Everyone loved it. So did I.

Film was the big passion, and I wanted to be a director. Spielberg was my hero: Duel, Jaws, Indiana Jones, Jurassic Park, and above all E.T., still my all time favourite.

My taste grew up fast. Scorsese, Taxi Driver, The King of Comedy, and then a new director called Tarantino. I loved the action era too, Stallone versus Schwarzenegger, Rocky, even Rocky IV. But it was The Karate Kid that first got me thinking about martial arts.

At 14 I snuck into the cinema to see Pulp Fiction and fell in love with film all over again. At 18, Guy Ritchie’s Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels did it once more, with a dash of Tarantino, a bit of 70s Michael Caine, and all of it London.

I never chased the dream, and that’s one of my big regrets. The closest I came was a horror film shot with friends at one of their houses, starring me. The tape is still out there somewhere.

From 14 to 18 I was at St Benedict’s, and I really didn’t get on there. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. I just hit a difficult patch. I couldn’t picture a future I wanted, I lacked the self belief to chase directing, and none of the “normal” careers appealed. Basketball at lunchtime was my escape.

Outside school, I went with the flow. Big club nights all over London, knowing every bouncer, getting in free. I zipped around the city in a little VW Polo with more confidence than sense. My poor mother.

After school I took a gap year, mostly because I still didn’t know what I wanted to do. It started with three months in Lyon, tagging along with my best friend on his year in France and learning French. Back in London I tried translating at a private hospital, then waiting tables for exactly one week. Neither was for me. Mostly, I hung out with friends, still searching.

I made it to university at London Guildhall, just as it became London Metropolitan University. I studied French (not as hard as I should have) and Business Studies, which I genuinely loved. But I was still searching, with no real idea what I wanted to do.

After uni I landed a job in accounts at a recruitment agency, then moved to Discovery Channel. Accounting was never for me. It wasn’t the numbers, it was the office: the routine, the boredom, the feeling of being trapped. I did just enough to get by, because my heart was somewhere else.

That somewhere else was Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Once I started, it was all I worked for. I trained nearly every night after work and every weekend. Teaching was never the plan. The goal was simple: train, compete, and enjoy it.

Then, as a purple belt, my friend Juniao asked if I could cover a class for him at a small school in Putney. I said yes, and to my surprise I enjoyed it. He asked again, and again, and slowly I got used to the idea of being the one at the front of the room.

Meanwhile, the dream of running my own business had never gone away. When things at work started getting difficult, I made the leap. I quit, and decided to try my hand at opening my own gym.

That’s how Wave BJJ was born.